NAPPIES AND VAMPIRE!!!

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*All pictures, copyrighted or not,

belong to their rightful owners.*

*No copyright infringement intended*

*THIS IS FICTION*

*Thank you for reading, bbs!!!*

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Uncle Tom Visits the Pattinsons…

Rob, Jr.:  “Uncle Tom!!!”

Tom:  “Hey, buddy.” *Takes 5-yeard old Robby in his arms*  “Where are your brothers?”

Rob, Jr.:  “TJ & Little JP are napping.”

Tom:  “And you?”

Rob, Jr.:  “I just woke up.”

Tom:  “Where are your mom and dad?”

Rob, Jr.:  “Oh…”  *Grins*  “Daddy is being a baby.”  *Laughs*

Tom:  *Nods*  “Yeah, your dad is a baby.”

Rob, Jr.:  “I know!”  *Sniggers*  “I went to their room to let them know I’m awake but mommy is…”  *Sniggers even more*

Tom:  *Chuckles*  “What is it that your mom is doing, buddy?” 

Rob, Jr.: “I think daddy wet his pants!”

Tom:  *Now with wide eyes*  “W-what was that?”

Rob, Jr.:  “I saw mommy changing daddy’s diaper!”

Tom:  *Just doesn’t know how to react*

Rob, Jr.:  *Still laughing*  “Daddy said, hurry up, honey, the kids will be up soon…”  *Giggles*  “I think daddy is embarrassed coz mommy still needs to change him!”  *Nods head*  “But not me!!! I’m a big boy now. I’m five!”  *Spread five fingers proudly*

Tom:  “Um… Well, buddy… Let’s go to the kitchen and get something to drink.”

*Five minutes later… Rob & Kristen joined Tom and Robby… Looking somewhat flushed… and HAPPY!*

Rob, Jr.:  “Daddy!!! Are you feeling better now?”

Rob:  *Narrows brows*

Kristen:  *Looks at Rob*

Tom:  *Shakes head*

Rob, Jr.:  “I remember… It always feels better when you have fresh nappy on.”

Tom:  *Winks at Kristen; then guffaws*

Rob, Jr.:  *Turns to his mommy*  “Mommy, did you have a hard time changing daddy’s nappy?”

Kristen:  *Chokes*

Rob:  *Whispers to Kristen*  “I told you.  You forgot to lock the door again!”

Kristen: *Whispers back*  “You were the last one to get in our bedroom!*

Rob, Jr.:  “It’s okay daddy.  You don’t have to feel bad.  Uncle Tom said piss happens.”

Rob & Kristen:  “Tom!!!”

Tom:  “Well, what was I supposed to tell your son, huh?  That you were--”

Rob & Kristen:  “Shhhh….”

Tom:  “By the way… You, two, look… um… freshly--”

Rob, Jr.:  “Changed?”

Tom:  “Yeah.  Changed.”  *Laughs*

Kristen:  *Changes Subject*  “Guys, what do you want for supper?”

Tom:  “You’re hungry again?  You just ate?”

Rob:  *Grins*  “Oh, yeah…”

Rob, Jr.:  “Oh, you brought snack to your room, mommy?  I thought we’re not allowed to do that?”

Tom:  *Whispers to Rob*  “Good luck.”

Rob:  “Robby, remember we, um, had a snack earlier.  Mommy had too much, I guess.”

Kristen:  “Um… Yeah…” *Eyes Rob*  “I’m still FULL!”

Tom:  “Oh, I bet!”

Rob, Jr.:  “Oh, uncle Tom… Do you know that daddy still thinks he’s a vampire?”

Kristen:  “What?  Sweetie, daddy is not a vampire.”

Rob, Jr.:  “I know… I know… Daddy isn’t a real vampire.  Just on movies.”

Rob:  “Son, why do you say I still think I’m a vampire.”

Rob, Jr.:  “Because you’re sucking mommy’s neck again!”

Rob:  “I- uh…” *Lost for words*

Rob, Jr.:  “Look at mommy!”

Tom and Rob:  *Looks at Kristen*

Rob, Jr.:  “She has a bite mark on her neck again!”

Kristen:  “Oh, shi… sh… shush!”

Rob, Jr.:  *Frowns*  “Mommy you’re shushing me!”

Kristen:  “No… No…. I, uh, almost spilled the chicken broth.”

Tom:  *Now hysterically laughing*  “Oh, god!  I love coming to your home… Robby is a riot!  Too smart for his own good!”

Rob, Jr.:  *Beams*  “I am smart!”

Tom:  “Vampire Rob!”

Rob, Jr.:  *Laughs with Tom*  “Daddy loves to suck mommy!”

Tom:  *Laughs even louder*

Rob:  *Dumbfounded*

Kristen:  *Hand on her neck, feeling the skin*  “It’s, ah, NOT a bite mark…”

Tom:  “Oh, you fell and hurt your neck?”  *Innocent look on his face*

Kristen:  “YES.  THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.”  *Looks menacingly at Tom*

Rob:  “Where did you fall, babe?”  *Winks at his wife*

Tom:  *Whispers to Rob but Kristen overhears*  “Your wife fell on your mouth and teeth!” 

  

Kristen:  *Flushing and mouthed, “SHUT UP” *

Rob, Jr.:  *Runs to give his mommy a hug*  “Did you get hurt mommy?”

Kristen:  *Takes son into her arms, then smiles at him*  “No, sweetie.  I’m okay.”

Rob, Jr.:  “Do you want daddy to kiss it so it won’t hurt anymore?”

Tom:  “Um, he just did!”  *Shoulders shaking from laughing hard*

Rob, Jr.:  “Well, I didn’t see it!”  *Turns to Rob*  “Daddy you better kiss mommy’s a-wee.”

Rob:  *Ruffles son’s hair, then kissed Kristen’s neck… Then lingers to kiss her lips*

Rob, Jr.: “Daddy, I don’t think mommy’s lips are hurting.”  *Giggles*

Tom:  “I beg to differ!”

Rob, Jr.:  *Turns to Tom*  “Uncle Tom, when are you going to have kids?”

Tom:  *Flustered*  “Whoa!!!”

Rob:  *Arms around wife’s waist*  “Yeah, Tom.  When are you going to have kids?”

Kristen:  “He needs to find a wife, first.”  *Laughs*

Tom:  “WELL… KRISTEN, WHAT’S FOR DINNER?”

**** Tee-Hee****