Thursday, February 24, 2011


Renesmee:  “Mom, Dad… Really?  I mean, really, really?  You’ve allowed a seventeen year old boy into our lives… Who’ve had the hots for you, Mom; hated you, Dad; wanted to kill me even before I was born; then changed his mind and wanted me for himself when I was just freakin’ two-minute-old…And that didn’t bother you at all?  No?  Ha?”  *Shakes head*

Bella:  “Oh, don’t look at me, dear… Remember, I was on my death bed, suffering through my transformation… So don’t point a finger at me!”

Edward:  “What? We-we-wait…  Hold on!  Bella, love… In case you’ve forgotten, you were sort of attached to that bloody dog; that there were times when I couldn’t help but feel and think like you were cheating on me with him… I was crushed when you kissed him, for crying out loud!” *Hisses* “Then, even when you were pregnant with Renesmee, you wanted him beside you!  So, please… Don’t put the blame on me!”

Bella:  “But that was not me! Remember how my feelings for him abruptly changed once Renesmee was born?  I even wanted to kill him for imprinting on our daughter!  Remember, baby?”  *Looks pleadingly at Edward*

Edward:  *Takes Bella in his arms; then looks at his daughter*  “Oh… That’s right… Of course!”

Renesmee:  *Rolls Eyes*  “What?”

Edward:  *Smiles at Renesmee*  “Honey, it was you!  It has always been you?”

Renesmee:  “Me, what?”

Edward:  “It was you who had invited Jacob into our lives!”

Renesmee: “Whoa! Whoa! Hold on, Father!  If you didn’t leave mom in New Moon in the first place, Jacob would never had the chance to get close to mom!”

Bella:  “Don’t blame your father, sweetheart.  He was just trying to keep me safe.”

Renesmee:  “You still believe that shit, mom? After all these years?   Dad was scared then.  So he left!  He was a pussy that’s why he freakin’ bailed out!”

Bella:  “Hey! We don’t say those words in this house, young lady!  And you don’t talk that way to your dad and about your dad!  He is the most amazing man!”

Renesmee:   *Laughs*  “Really mom?  My language?!  Sure I do sleep at night; and you and dad don’t.  But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t hear!  God!  The things you, two, do when you think I’m sleeping!  I cringed the first few times… But I’m used to it now, so don't worry!  Thanks to Uncle Jasper and Uncle Emmett who helped made our bedrooms soundproof!  Vampire sex is wild and hot!”

Edward:  *Clears throat*  “That’s the TV!!!  Your mom and I--”

Renesmee:  “Save it, Dad!  Don’t worry.  I understand!  I was born  mature, remember?”

Bella*Looks away*  “So you can hear--”

Renesmee:  “You’re pretty loud, mom!  Even you, dad!”  *Sniggers*  “And besides… I’m gifted, too, you know!” 

Bella:  “So… Um… Why are you quizzing us now about Jacob!  Why the anger?  Where is it coming from, sweetie!  Did he hurt you?”  *mumbles:  “I’m gonna kill him!”*

Renesmee*Sighs*  “Well… It’s just that… It’s not fair!”

Edward:  “What’s not fair, sweetheart?”

Renesmee:  *Starts to pace the room*  “I’m stuck with him since he imprinted on me!  I mean… It sucks!  I was left without a choice!  I can’t meet guys… I can’t go out… I can’t do anything… It’s frustrating!  He chained me to him and you’ve allowed him!”  *In tears*  “It’s like… I can’t help to feel like… Like you allowed him, dad, to be with me so that he’ll lay off mom!  I know mom is your life… She is the love your life… And I know you love me, too… It’s just that… I FEEL SO TRAPPED!”

Edward:  *Embraces daughter* “Oh, honey… I’m so sorry.  You were okay with it!  What changed?  Why the sudden change of heart?”

Bella:  *Smiles*  “You want out.  You’re in love with someone else!”

Renesmee:  *Cries harder* 

Edward:  “What, honey?”

Bella:  “It’s Nahuel, isn’t it?”

Renesmee:  *Shakes head*  “No!  He wants to go out with me… He actually asks me almost every day.  But I think he got the message and he’s planning to go back to South America soon.”  *Sighs*  “Well… Mom, Dad--- You know how imprinting works, right?  It’s like falling in love at first sight. It's so strong and that you  want to be tied to that person and would do or be anything for that person.  It was something like doing or being anything for that one person that you imprint on and that person is basically yours for the taking and no one else can compare to them.”

Bella:  “But that’s exactly what happened, honey.  Jacob didn’t want to.  It just happened.  So what’s the problem now?”

Renesmee:  *Shakes head*  “It’s just that… I’m confused now!  “Um… Don’t get mad at them… Okay?”

Edward & Bella:  “Okay… Them?” *Confused*

Renesmee:  “Well… Um… Paul, Collin, Brady, and Seth…”

Edward:  *Furrows brows & clinches fists*  “What about them?!?” *Stern voice*

Renesmee:  “Dad!  You promised!  Chill!”

Edward:  *Relaxes*  “Fine… Fine… What about them?”

Renesmee:  “They, um… They sort of… They sort of imprinted me!

Bella:  *Chokes*  “What?!?  ALL OF THEM!”


Bella:  “Honey…” *Clasps hands*

Edward:  *Smiles*

Renesmee:  “O-kay… This is not the reaction I visualized!”

Bella:  “Well, I guess… That solves your problem, dear.  You’ll get rid of Jacob sooner than you think!”

Edward:  “However… You may also lose Seth!”

Renesmee:  “What?”

Edward:  “They’re plotting how to kill each other now, honey!”

Renesmee:  “Holy shit!”  *Grabs cell phone*

Bella:  “What are you doing?  Who are you calling?”

Renesmee:  “I’d better call Nahuel!  I’d better start hanging out with him.  I DON’T WANT TO BE ALONE FOR THE NEXT 100 YEARS LIKE DAD BEFORE HE MET YOU, MOM!---”  *Smiles, then concentrates on her phone call*  “Oh, Hi, Nahuel… Um… do you still want to  go see a movie?  Yeah!  I'll be ready in half an hour!  Aww... That's sweet---” 
Bella to Edward:  “Baby, I think your daughter just started our war against the wolves!”

Emmett:  “YES!  YES! Yeah, baby! Finally!!!  Some action around here!  I’ve been so fucking bored since that fucking peace treaty with those wolves & the Volturies!”  *Embraces Renesmee*  “Oh, I love my niece!”

Rosalie:  “I taught her well!  She’s not settling for the first guy who shows her interest!”  *Wipes invisible tears!*

***Oh, boy!***

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*No copyright infringement intended*
*This is, of course, fiction*
Thank you for visiting this blog!


  1. Ohh BB...U always made my day..hahhaaha...Poor Nessie..She had no choice about this imprinting things..but always, make this become something funny and good to read,hehhee..And now Nessie has chance to think about someone else..Boo boo,Nahuel etc..Thanks to U 4 that..Love it bb...Happy Friday...GBU

  2. Love it Ofie! You are so much better than SM concluding the saga....ja ja ja

  3. LOL!
    Yeah, I like Seth better hahaha...

    Love it ^^ Thank you for updating hehe...Have a nice weekend, bb :)

  4. I totally agree, your plot is much better than SM. Now, if we can only get you to take over designing Bella's wedding dress from SM!

  5. Awwwww.... swetties, you don't know how much your words mean to me! You are all special. Thank you!

    Now... If I were to design Bella's gown... LOL... I'll show Kristen's... I mean Bella's back... Bare back, darlin'! LOL.

    Thank again, sweeties. And I apologize for the delayed response.