Friday, September 10, 2010

NO MORE PARANOID ROB

September 10, 2010 Around NOON:

Rob joins Sam and Tom at the hotel’s restaurant for brunch.

Tom: “You’re such an ass! Can you be more obvious?”

Rob: “What?”

Sam: “Take that fucking obnoxious GRIN off of your face.”

Rob: *Can’t stop smiling* “Really.  I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Tom: “Whatever!”

Sam: “So, where’s Kristen.”

Rob: “Work.”

Tom: “You didn't let her sleep, then you sent her to work?"

Sam:  "Tsk..tsk.. Rob, you are mean. You put her on, uh... um... 10-hour straight-night-shift... then..."

Rob:  "Oh, fuck off you, two!"  *Grins wider*

Sam: “What was that they said... you know, that garba-jo article online... Master & Servant?  Did they say you were Kristen's assistant or something."  *Guffawed*

Rob: *Beams* “We don't get bothered by that kind of talking!  *Chuckles* "At first, though, we thought someone saw us wearing Master & Maid costu--- Shit!  Nothing.  Nothing... You didn't hear anything!!!"

Tom:  "We know, Rob.  We know!" *Changes subject*  “So, how did Kristen entertain herself before you came?”

Rob: *Eyes bulge*  “Dude! I can’t tell you that. That's private!"

Sam: “Rob, I think what Tom meant was… before we arrived here in New Orleans... how did Kristen entertain herself?  You know... to pass the boredom.”

Rob: *Clears throat* “I knew that!” *Composes self* “Well, she watched a lot of TV; some sports and stuff.”

Tom:  *Chokes* "SPORTS?"

Rob: “Yeah. Football, golf, tennis, baseball…”

Tom: “Wow, Rob! I’m so proud of you. ”

Rob: *Furrows brows* “Ha? Why?”

Tom: “Look at you! So cool and relaxed.”

Rob: “What?! You’re scaring the fuck out of me! What do you mean?”

Tom: “Not a hint of paranoia or jealousy in you! Oh wait… Shit! Kristen adores your PROTECTIVE NATURE!"

*SILENCE*

Sam: “Oh yeah!!! That’s right!!!”

Rob: *Now annoyed* “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”

Tom: “Well, YOU SAID KRISTEN WATCHED SPORTS, right?  AND SHE WATCHED TENNIS!!!”

Rob: “So?!”

Sam: “US OPEN WAS ON LAST WEEK, RIGHT?"  *Ponders*  "I think it's still on... Anyway...Didn’t that American Tennis Player… what’s his name, Tom?”

Tom: “I think it’s John…John Isner… the tall guy.”

Sam: “Yeah, yeah! That's the guy.  Didn't he ask Kristen out on a date when he met her at the Letterman show?...  Is there even truth to that?

Tom: “I read about it online so I don’t know if it’s true or not.., Kristen didn’t mention… Wait… I think she did… Oh, I’m not sure…” *Turns to Rob* “Did Kristen tell you anything about it?.... Rob?... Rob?...WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING?”

Rob: *Continues to walk* “I’m going to fucking Google that fucking ass-fuck, mother-fucker, TENNIS-FUCKING-PLAYER-FUCK!!!  Then, when I'm done with that fuck, I AM GOING TO SCAN THE NET AND FUCKING FIND OUT OTHER FUCKERS WHO'S FUCKING WITH ME AND MY BABY!"  *Continues to mumble profanities*

Sam: “Tom, that wasn’t cool!”

Tom: “Hey!  Don't judge, man.  I did warn him and Kristen that I'm going to get even.  I'm still not over that incident in Montreal.  With that picture of them kissing and me in the background, watching like a fool...  That’s fucking embarrassing."

Sam: “Then, you're even, I guess.  Rob was fucking livid!"  *Sighs*  "Well, do you think Rob will be cool with you when he reads that crappy article about Kristen falling in love with you?”

*DEAD SILENCE…*

Sam: “Tom?”

Tom: “OH! FUCK ME!!!” *Runs to catch up with Rob*  "Rob, wait!  I have an idea!  Let's surprise Kristen on the set!"

8 comments:

  1. Gosh it was unfuckingbelievable! First the talk about 'came', then about the tennis player and in the end about Tom and K. Jesussss Rob has a lot on his mind right now! LMAO
    I know it's fiction, but it's a good one! ;D
    But i bet he doesn't like stuff like that(i'm talking about the gossip)about his bbgirl.
    But here between us: Kristen was really gorgeous at Letterman, she was too beautiful, of course he knows she calls attention, male attention! lol
    Great as always!

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  2. Hey, RKsoulmates913! First, let me thank you for taking time to drop in and to write your thoughts. I have now doubt, not 1 iota, that Rob&Kristen more solid than a rock! They're so into each other. But they're in the world where "the villains" would want to destroy them. They won't be beat! Their love is too powerful! LOL! I believe that! And yeah! Kristen's super gorgeous that night at Letterman.. and she's naturally beautiful!

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  3. Kristen was HOT AS HELL on Letterman. Who can blame that John guy?~ ^^

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  4. rob my poorbaby that was not right you guy's messing with rob you guy's going to get it rob, my friend i'am praying foryou andkriste for safety and pertcthion angel's your frind leslie,j'rush

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  5. Bahahahahahahaha!That was hilarious!

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  6. ohhhh ofie....
    it's so funny!!!
    ahhh always love ur story my dear ^^

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  7. i've been away for a while, then found some new posts and funny as always i really like it :)

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