Rob: *Frowning* I AM NOT ANSWERING ANY CALLS. If anyone… and I MEAN ANYONE calls, I’m not answering. If ANYONE calls YOU to talk to me… I AM NOT AVAILABLE.
Tom: *Shows concern* “Are you okay, Rob?”
Sam: “Whatever it is, you can talk to us. You know that. Right?”
Rob: *Frowns deeper* “Kristen hates me.”
Tom: “Dude, YOU ARE FUCKIN’ CRAZY IF YOU THINK THAT! THAT GIRL IS DEVOTED TO YOU. WHAT THE HELL? YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER.”
Sam: “And what, may I ask, made you believe that?”
Rob: “She refuses to take my calls and she has not responded to any of my texts and emails just yet.”
Tom: “DUDE, YOUR GIRL IS WORKING!”
Rob: “Yeah, but…”
Sam: “But what?”
Rob: *Takes deep breaths* Maybe she’d seen the photos of me with girls… you know, in the bars we went to… posted online. But she should have faith in me. I fuckin’ love her. I will never cheat on her.”
Tom: “You’re over-thinking things again, Rob. She’s working. Or maybe she left her cellphone in her room… or something… Don’t jump into conclusion, Rob. Come on. Even I will never be convinced that Kristen will ever, ever hate you. She loves you. Period.”
Sam: “I agree with Tom. So how many texts have you sent her and how many times have you called her?”
Rob: *Looks away* “Um, I don’t know… I lost count... maybe 25.”
Sam: “Shakes head* “Well… that’s, um… that’s not so bad… right, Tom?”
Tom: *Nodded, trying not to laugh* “I’m, ah, sure she’ll call you back very soon.”
Rob: “NO. I WILL NOT ANSWER! I’ll just take it easy from here and will just fix this when we get there.”
Sam and Tom: “Okay. Fine. YOU’RE NOT AVAILABLE. Got it.”
5 MINUTES LATER…. Rob’s phone rings…
FIRST RING:
Rob: *Snatched the phone faster than a flying bullet and slowly pulls over* “OH, THANK GOD! BABY, ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU HURT? WHY DIDN’T YOU ANSWER MY CALLS AND TEXTS? I WAS SO WORRIED, BABE… I LOVE YOU… I MISS YOU… We're almost there... Oh, you forgot to charge you phone... I figured that... *coughs*... ”
Tom to Sam: “Dude, I think we’re better off checking in at a different hotel in New Orleans. We’ll be on our own for days!”
You are awesome! I love these dialogs! I can just picture them this way! PerFUCKINGfect!!!
ReplyDeleteThat really did sound like a realistic conversation.
ReplyDelete