Thursday, September 9, 2010

ROB WON'T TAKE ANY CALLS

Rob: *Frowning* I AM NOT ANSWERING ANY CALLS. If anyone… and I MEAN ANYONE calls, I’m not answering. If ANYONE calls YOU to talk to me… I AM NOT AVAILABLE.

Tom: *Shows concern* “Are you okay, Rob?”

Sam: “Whatever it is, you can talk to us. You know that. Right?”

Rob: *Frowns deeper* “Kristen hates me.”

Tom: “Dude, YOU ARE FUCKIN’ CRAZY IF YOU THINK THAT! THAT GIRL IS DEVOTED TO YOU. WHAT THE HELL? YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER.”

Sam: “And what, may I ask, made you believe that?”

Rob: “She refuses to take my calls and she has not responded to any of my texts and emails just yet.”

Tom: “DUDE, YOUR GIRL IS WORKING!”

Rob: “Yeah, but…”

Sam: “But what?”

Rob: *Takes deep breaths* Maybe she’d seen the photos of me with girls… you know, in the bars we went to… posted online. But she should have faith in me. I fuckin’ love her. I will never cheat on her.”

Tom: “You’re over-thinking things again, Rob. She’s working. Or maybe she left her cellphone in her room… or something… Don’t jump into conclusion, Rob. Come on. Even I will never be convinced that Kristen will ever, ever hate you. She loves you. Period.”

Sam: “I agree with Tom. So how many texts have you sent her and how many times have you called her?”

Rob: *Looks away* “Um, I don’t know… I lost count... maybe 25.”

Sam: “Shakes head* “Well… that’s, um… that’s not so bad… right, Tom?”

Tom: *Nodded, trying not to laugh* “I’m, ah, sure she’ll call you back very soon.”

Rob:NO.  I WILL NOT ANSWER!  I’ll just take it easy from here and will just fix this when we get there.”

Sam and Tom: “Okay. Fine. YOU’RE NOT AVAILABLE. Got it.”

5 MINUTES LATER…. Rob’s phone rings…

FIRST RING:

Rob: *Snatched the phone faster than a flying bullet and slowly pulls over* “OH, THANK GOD! BABY, ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU HURT? WHY DIDN’T YOU ANSWER MY CALLS AND TEXTS? I WAS SO WORRIED, BABE… I LOVE YOU… I MISS YOU… We're almost there... Oh, you forgot to charge you phone... I figured that... *coughs*... ”

Tom to Sam: “Dude, I think we’re better off checking in at a different hotel in New Orleans. We’ll be on our own for days!”

2 comments:

  1. You are awesome! I love these dialogs! I can just picture them this way! PerFUCKINGfect!!!

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  2. That really did sound like a realistic conversation.

    ReplyDelete