Saturday, January 29, 2011



Rob: "Now promise me something, Kristen. Do not bite the apple no matter how hungry you get, okay?"
Kristen: "Honey, we all know how the story went.”
Rob:  “Yeah.  But now we know we can prevent it!”
Kristen:  “Prevent what, Sweetie?”
Rob:  “Prevent the Prince from kissing you!!!”

 (Copyrighted photo belong to their rightful owner/s.  
No copyright infringement intended.  Thanks.
I wish I could replace the character's faces with
Kristen's, Rob's, and the Brit Pack's *sigh*)

Kristen:  “Hmm… That looks easy.”  *Turns to Rob*  “Babe, can you go to the grocery store and get me the ingredients for the dish I’m gonna be preparing for dinner.”

Rob:  “Make a list.  I’ll call Dean.”

Kristen:  “Thanks, babe.  I can add this recipe to my collection.”

Rob:  *Stops what he was doing.*  “Babe, will you be cooking for the cast and crew of Snow White and the Huntsman?”

Kristen:  *Laughs*  “Snow White cooked and cleaned for the Seven Dwarfs when she lived with them, remember?”

Rob:  *Grunts* 

Kristen:  “What?”

Rob:  “Why?  I mean… Can’t they alter the story, at least?  I mean, why would I allow my woman live with seven men, cook for them…”

Kristen:  “Really, Rob?”

Rob:  *Continues to mumble*  “Then, these guys will leave you unprotected when they all know the Evil Queen wants you dead!”    *Shakes head*  “I’d better tell Dean to audition for the movie for the role of Grumpy!”

Kristen:  “Aww, baby…”

Rob:  “Hmm… While I’m at it, I’d better call Tom.”

Kristen:  “Why?”

Rob:  “I’ll ask him to call the pack.”

Kristen:  “Whatever for?”

Rob:  “Wait, babe…” *Concentrates on his phone conversation*  “Hey, Tom, I have a possible job for you… Yeah… You need to audition though… What movie you ask?  It’s for the Snow White and the Huntsman… No, not the role of the Prince, dumbo!  Dopey!  Yeah!  One of the Dwarfs.  And while you do that why don’t you bring the pack along with you.  Call Marcus to audition for DocBobby for Bashful.  Sam for Sneezy.  And call Eddie Redmayne… No, not for the prince role.  God!!!”  *Sighs*  “As Happy!” *Stops to think*  “Oh, that’s right… Damn it!  Oh, Oh!!! I have the best one for that role…. Yeah, for the role of Sleepy!!!”  *Grins in satisfaction, proud of himself*  “JELLA!  Oh, he’ll nail it!”  *Giddy*  “So, go audition altogether, okay.  Who?  Grumpy?  I got that covered.  I’m sending Dean to audition.  Okay, buddy.  Thanks.”

Kristen:  *Dumbfounded!*

Rob:  *Smug*  “I’m pretty sure Cosmopolis will finish first before Snow White, babe.  I’ll audition for the PRINCE!”

Kristen:  *Shakes head*  “Snow White and Brit Pack!”

Rob:  “PERFECT!!!”

Over a year later….

Snow White and The Huntsman


Kristen Stewart as Snow White
With the Special Participation of Robert Pattinson as the Prince

Seven Dwarfs:

Dean as Grumpy
Tom as Dopey
Marcus as Doc
Bobby as Bashful
Sam as Sneezy
Eddie as Happy

And introducing:

Jella Stewart Pattinson as Sleepy


Tweeted Saturday afternoon on 1/29/2011

R: "Babe, are you sure the dwarfs kill the prince in this movie?"
K: "I think so!"
R: "Okay. Go ahead and accept the role!"

K: "Rob, these are the dwarfs who saved Snow White from the Evil Witch!"
R: "I know. But there are 7 of them! No way!"

Rob to Kristen: "Fine! You can take the Snow White role as long as I get to be the Prince who kisses you in the end!"

R: "If that Mirror On The Wall winks at you, that's it! You're declining the Snow White role! Understood?"
K: *smiles* "Ok, babe!"

R: "If that Magic Mirror On The Wall refuses to say you're d fairest of them all, babe! I'll freakin' break it to pieces!"
K: *Gushes*

R: "Wait. The huntsman will take u to the forest?"
K: "Yeah!"
R: "Alone?"
K: "Yeah"
R: "That's a deal breaker there!"

R: "So you'll die in this movie?"
K: "Only until the prince comes & kisses me."
R: "Wrong answer, Kristen!"

R: "You know, Edward Cullen is the best candidate for d prince role for Snow White?"
K: *Angry* "Are you cheating on Bella?"


On Saturday 29th January 2011, @Ate_Ofie said:

R: "I'm so happy for you, baby. You are perfect for this role! Go for it!"

K: *Sniffs* "You don't love me anymore!"

R: "What? Where did that come from?"

K: "You're supposed to ask how many men will star in this movie. Who's kissing me? Who's gonna get to hold me..." *Cries*

R: "I'm trying to be supportive here, baby. It is hard to do that sometimes because..." *Thinks* "Wait a minute... does that mean you're okay with BelAmi and Cosmopolis because you don't love me?"

K: *Sobs* "NO! But I AM A SUPPORTIVE GIRLFRIEND and I know you know I love you."

R: "And you don't know I love you?"

K: "I know that... but you're easily giving me away now!"


K: "So you're okay with the prince, the dwarfs and everything?"


K: "I'm sorry..."

R: "Now that it's okay for me to bitch... let me think about this a little longer..."

K: "OK."

R: "OK?"

K: "Mm-hmm!"

R: "God, you're such a... If one of the male stars finds your, uh, stubbornness alluring... I'm pulling you from the set myself, you hear?"

K: *Swoons* "Oh, there's my Rob! You really do love me!"

Jella:  “Oh, God….”


Heigh Ho song by the seven dwarfs:



  1. OMG THIS IS HILARIOUS! this is the first time I post a comment here but i love all your stuff <3

  2. Oh, I'm so touched. Thank you so much. :)

  3. HAHA Awwwww!!! The Snow White and the Britpack!!! YAY the perfect cast ever and with R as the prince and introducing Jella :)and maybe we could also get a Nonsten LOL for the evil witch haha!!!Awww can't stop laughing!!!You really are best!!!

  4. How do you come up with this genius writing day after day? I cannot stop laughing. And I have to agree with Jella at the end. Jealous Rob and Kristen are too much. This is some funny stuff.

  5. Say no more!WIINNN!!and i love 'grumpy' part!bwhuahahhahahhaha...